One of the greatest things that we can do for ourselves is realize our worth. As a young Black woman searching for her most valuable self, I can wholeheartedly reflect and say that I granted the wrong men access to me.
We have all been there. You get caught up in the fantasy of someone versus the reality. While the reality is that he is emotionally immature, inconsiderate, and downright disrespectful, the fantasy of him being the one that the Most High chose for you hangs on by an unreliable thread. You clutch onto the bare minimum and small crumbs that he musters up, but you deserve a lot more--even if you don't recognize it.
Now, if you were sober minded (free from intoxication by substance or his phallus), you would realize this early. It's hard to see red flags with rose colored glasses on.
When the Most High chooses you as His daughter, you aren't allowed to accept mediocrity. You aren't allowed to settle. See, your life is bonded to His reputation..his name and legacy.
To whom much is given, much is required. To whom the Kingdom is given, much is required. This means your complete devotion to the process of refinement and being perfected. From understanding your value to increasing your wisdom. From resisting temptation to overcoming obstacles. You are expected to become better. You are expected to be better.
And, that's something that I had to come into understanding. As the Daughter of the King, a woman purposed to defend the Kingdom, the King, and his laws, I had to be made very aware of the chinks in my armor. And what better way to discover them than through battle?
Wherefore take unto you the whole armor of Elohiym, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. EPH'SIYM (EPHESIANS) 6:13 את CEPHER
I had to be taken through a trial of lust, disobedience, vanity, and emotional loss. And the trial came packaged with long locs, strong arms, and a charming wit.
And yeah.. I folded. He was fine and talking right. (Don't judge me.)
I know I didn't do my due diligence to prove him. An error that I could've avoided by taking heed to the Script.
The simple believes every word: but the prudent man looks well to his going. MISHLEI (PROVERBS) 14:15 את CEPHER
If you would get a friend, prove him first and be not hasty to credit him. SIRACH (ECCLESIASTICUS) 6:7 את CEPHER
Because of my lack of wisdom and disobedience, I had to endure a passionately toxic "love" and an intensely painful separation. But, with separation comes sobriety.
While it may be painful at first, likening to withdrawal, you will eventually see the other side. Being able to reflect on past behaviors, Scripture, and conversations with my father helped me to realize just how much I was devaluing myself (and just how great a man that I truly deserve).
You can't stay stuck in the sunken place forever. You have to restore & strengthen. The Most High has your best interest at heart. So, even though refinement may be painful, it's necessary.
YOU DESERVE A HIGH VALUE MAN OF YAH.
So, if he doesn't show the characteristics of that, then don't give him the time of day.
If he doesn't want to know the Most High and isn't actively pursuing him, save yourself the trouble. Please, listen to me. I was sacrificed so you don't have to be. Lol!
If the man doesn't know my Father, he damn sure can't and won't know me.
Because after all, I am my Father's legacy.
Zhateyah Yisrael contributed this article.
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